 It was almost exactly a year ago this week that the shizz finally hit the fan in my marriage after a long, painful build. I look back on that time in my life now and wonder how I survived it in one piece. My best guess is that it was a mixture of unwavering love and support from family and friends, my own tenacity and a healthy dose of grace. Whatever the recipe, I am so grateful to be where I am today.
I don’t want to disparage my ex unnecessarily, but there were moments last year when I felt like I was cast as the tortured lead in a trailer park soap opera. It would be an understatement to say that this little suburban white girl was not at all prepared for that particular brand of crazy.
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 I mentioned in an earlier post that I went through a phase of my life now affectionately deemed by many as the “Angry Amy” years. I didn’t come up with that on my own, I adopted it later.
My friends called me that behind my back, and rightfully so. Every fiber of my being exuded hostility and resentment for the better part of a decade. In fact, a more accurate name for that time of my life would be, “The Epoch of the Bitter Bitch.” Ha! Sure, I can joke about it now because it’s long over, but it wasn’t funny at the time … for me or for anyone around me. Just ask my mother.  My BFF pointed out to me recently that I don’t know how to date like a normal person. See, I’m finally starting to re-engage with the world after the breakup of my marriage earlier this year, so I’ve started to furtively peek over the edge of the singles scene again, kind of like a suburban prairie dog … or something. Anyway, I recently mentioned something about a certain fella to my friend, and she promptly laughed at me. “Uh huh. You don’t know how to just date a guy,” she said.
“Now wait just a second…” I retorted, then reconsidered. “No. You’re right. I am totally clueless.” |
About Amy HiggsA former newspaper columnist, Amy takes her random, slice-of-life stories to the web. After 12 years, she's still just saying. Archives
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