 If I had started this blog a few years ago, I would have used it as a venue to bitch and complain about all of the people, places and things that pissed me off. At the time, there was no shortage of all three.
Sure, my poisonous thinking might’ve produced some entertaining prose, but all that soul-sucking pessimism really accomplished was to feed my overall unhappiness. Today (thank God), the cynic in me is dead and buried, and I don’t want to use this space to resurrect her. My life is VERY good, and I attribute that primarily to an overwhelmingly positive attitude and an optimistic faith that everything, ultimately, will be OK. All that said, I have been dwelling on one particular nugget of negativity so much during the past few months that I’ve decided to write it down here in the hopes that I can finally LET. IT. GO.
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 I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the groundwork of starting and building a business. Understandable, since I’m kinda in the middle of the building part right now.
I’m pretty secure about the services I’m selling – the marketable skills of writing, editing and media relations consulting. But when it comes to the back-end of actually running a business that’s financially solvent and in legal compliance with the IRS and other government entities, I’m not quite as confident.  In the past few years, I’ve become reliant on my own personal brand of spiritually. It is a necessary part of my survival. As a result, I’ve started to pay serious attention to what the universe is trying to tell me.
You can dismiss that kind of thinking as new age horseshit if you want, but being open to signs – and actually heeding them – has made a huge difference in not only my overall serenity, but also the basics of daily living. I have no doubt that these signs have been out there hovering in the netherworld all along. I’m just now starting to perceive how they apply to me. My journey of self-discovery (you can read about here and here) has led me to chase my bliss on every level, personal and professional. In the process of doing that, I’ve developed a solid connection with a higher power – God, Great Spirit, whatever you want to call it. And I have found that the God of my understanding always gives me what I need exactly when I need it.  Last week was, without a doubt, one the very best weeks I’ve ever experienced in my professional career. If I could have scripted a perfect first week on my own as a freelance writer, editor and media consultant, last week would’ve been it.
I started the week energized, feeling for the first time in years that I was at the mouth of a vast tunnel, beginning an exciting and important journey. While I can’t see exactly what’s waiting for me at the end of this new tunnel, there’s an intense, vivid light beckoning me forward. Last week, I took my first steps toward it.  So I’ve got this coffee mug (pictured at left) that has adorned every desk I’ve occupied during my 15 years in the professional world. I hadn’t thought about it in a long time until this past Friday, when I gingerly wrapped it in newspaper and packed it into a box with the rest of the junk from what I hope was my last corporate job.
The mug had become much more of an ornament than a drinking vessel in recent years, so it was gathering dust high on a shelf at my last gig. There was a time in the late 90s, however, when it supplied my daily dose of dirty hot water, er, office-grade java. (So I’m a coffee snob, sue me!)  This is my last week at a salaried job, and I’m feeling a little overwhelmed. Chaotic. Frenetic. Batshit crazy, if you will.
I’ve got tons to do to wind up my full-time gig, plus a couple big deadlines on the freelance writing front as well. And it just dawned on me that I have also managed to book myself for both work and social activities every single night this week. Can you say, “overextended?” Shoo. I am exhausted already. Oh, and have I mentioned that my first week as an entrepreneur, beginning March 11, is jam packed with deadlines and meetings, too?? No rest for the wicked, apparently. |
About Amy HiggsA former newspaper columnist, Amy takes her random, slice-of-life stories to the web. After 12 years, she's still just saying. Archives
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